The past few nights I have been going through a ritual in case I go to the hospital before the girls wake up. I label things, hang more lists on the refrigerator, organize the laundry. Perhaps this is how some of you live all the time? Fascinating.
Then I get up every morning and start again. (Though I do find my own labels helpful…)
It’s a funny thing to feel so utterly indispensable in your own private world, while the whole time knowing, deep down, they can and will carry on. And if lunchboxes somehow get switched, all will survive.
So…we spent the weekend at a beautiful wedding with the dearest of friends, came home to hunker down for the storm, enjoyed a day off and today a school delay, put together a cat costume for tomorrow, planned a birthday for Saturday, wrote papers for a class not due for another week, the whole time still list making, and labeling and trying to stay 4 hospital stay days, ahead of everything.
And I’m trying to enjoy even the neuroses of being ahead, knowing all too well that in 9 days or under, I will go back to being behind for no doubt the rest of my life.
Grateful over here for power and warmth, feeling the sweetness of all the offers of help no matter the hour, and praying for our friends in places ravaged by this storm..thinking, in a raw, heartsick kind of way, specifically of those being evacuated from hospitals without power, just nine short hours from here. Oh what sheer luxury my trite list- making is…